Tears Roll Down My Cheeks

Finally i can let out my anger and sadness through crying.
I was crying a few seconds ago.
Now, my eyes feel like closing . Whatever.
I feel so aloneee . gosh. Why am I the target to be scold??
What did I do wrong??? I am not a bad person. So why people keep scolding me?

Here's the story : A few days ago my mum told me that we will go to a kenduri today. And then two days ago my mum said we dont have to go. so okay la. i woke up late this morning at 10.30am. and i thought we're not going. and no one told me what time we're going or no one woke me up. i was clueless. and then i eat n bathe as usual. n then after bathing i ask my mum what to wear. then all of a sudden my mum raise her voice said 'pakai je la baju pape, masih nak tanya mama lagi' and when she looked at me still wearing a towel, she was exploding and said ' CEPAT siap ! .. kena tinggal kangg' (stress on the 'cepat') . and i was like wtf ? in my heart la ofc. so i pick a baju kurung . and then i tried to wear contact lense but that stpd thing wont go in my eyes. so everyone was downstairs , in the car. n i hate to rush so i just said i dont wanna go. so then i cried cos no one wants to pujuk me n all. what kind of family i have?? my father being so quiet, my brother's uncareness, my sister's whateverness n my mother's madness, who's gonna take care of my back? i mean i love them all but i jz feel so left out. d odd one out. so alone. n ,y friends doesn't even care. if i told them they would probably say, "hekeleh..apelahh....." . GAHHH!! sabrina je yg kesah. tp x nk kcu die. and bsides, i wanna b alone now. only music can cheer me up now.
i dunno how to describe the people i wanna be with. no one cares . i'm not famous. i'm not like hanna cos wherever hanna goes , people will like her and wanna b with her. cm van and alyssa la, i noticed. yes, im a bit jealous. i want a friend that noticed if im gone and always looking for me.. and this ends up to the memories i had with iman. she is one of the BEST friend i ever had. but i have no idea what's goin on with her rite now. is she avoiding me? haihh. y must things change?

guess im born to be alone.

cheers with tears,
diyana :'|